Stuck, Anxious, and Uncertain
Updated: Dec 24, 2018
A few weeks ago I met a young woman who has an incredible amount of potential, is driven, passionate, energetic, and more. And though she does have these qualities, she finds herself stuck in her career and life, with a lot of anxiety, and depression. I remember her telling me that since a young age, she didn't "fit in", which resulted her mother taking her to the psychologist (or perhaps it was a psychiatrist). Her mother felt that something was wrong with her. And as it turns out, the doctor told her that she is a highly gifted/intelligent child. It's more often than not, that children of this caliber don't fit in to the contrived systems that run rampant in our world. And these systems (societal ways of living and working) manipulates them to fit into something that is not natural for them. 20 years later for this young women, she's reached a point where she can no longer go on like this.
In the last weeks I've been meeting more people and clients such as the young woman mentioned above, that have reached a point in their life where they realize they have to do something about their situation. The situation being that they feeling stuck in life/work, which results in different levels of anxiety, uncertainty, and some form of depression. So what kind of stuckness is it? It's when you've come to a point where you know that how you're living your life is not fulfilling. When you know that something is "off". When you are not fulfilled in your job, or even worse, you dread going to work. [Of course people experience stuckness in other parts of their life such as in their relationships, but I'll save that for another article.] Many people get to this point where it's no longer ok for them to just work to pay bills. They know they're meant to do something else but they don't know what that is. And one of the reasons why many people don't know what that is, is because they have gone deep into the rabbit hole of the path of survival. And the darkness of that rabbit hole doesn't allow them to see what is beyond the other side where there is a spec of light. The light being where their purpose and fulfillment begins. But what leads people to follow the rabbit hole? Various reasons which I'm happy to discuss as it varies from person to person. I will say this though, often times these people weren't allowed to express themselves or be as they were; so they were conditioned and molded by their environment (family, society) to fit into something that is easy to digest, control, and define... as there's no room for something out of the box (or at least that's what their environment thinks).
The great thing thing about all of this is that each person does have a choice to change direction. And it starts with becoming aware that you are in fact stuck and want to do something about it. From here, the easiest thing to do is to get external support (aside from friends/family). Whether it's a coach, therapist, or going to some form of workshop or retreat (not just a yoga retreat), allow yourself to get support from someone. Often times people want to figure it out on their own and not seek help. But the situation with that is that it is extremely likely that you'll fall back into the same pattern, follow your monkey mind, and trick yourself into thinking that "I don't need anyone. I can do it myself." And while we are all innately gifted and able beings, it is more than ok for you to seek support. It doesn't make you weak, stupid, or incapable. It actually is an act of courage, self-love, and determination to get out of your stuckness. Learn to not listen to your incessant thoughts that keep you stuck, excusing that there's no need to do anything about anything. There are numerous ways to get unstuck. So whatever piques your curiousity or intrigues you, follow that and start. Many people such as myself are available to support, give space, and guide the process of transformation, clarity, and unstuckness. Trust me, you are not alone in this. *Photo by Ben Hershey on Unsplash